After changing my work e-mail signature to reflect my new title, it hit me: “This looks like it belongs to a grown-up!” Taking a step back, I guess that to an outsider, I do look like an adult. I’m done with college. I have a job with lots of responsibility. I’m married with two lovely cat-children. I pay bills. I go out for drinks with people and attend dinner parties. What more is there?
Yet still, somehow I don’t feel like a grown-up. Our society is lacking in that moment, that ritual, that lets you know that you have achieved adulthood. Wikipedia tells me that Arnold van Gennep, a pioneer in the field of folklore, divided rites of passages in three sections, preliminary, liminaire, and postliminaire (separation, limbo, and incorporation). Traditionally in our society we leave our parents’ home around the age of 18. We have the separation from childhood, but I can’t think of a clear point where one is brought into adulthood. Are you an adult during college? After graduation? During your first job? When summer associates are with us, recruiters sometimes refer to them as “kids,” yet they’re often in their late 20’s, with advanced degrees.
But maybe I’m coming at this wrong. Why would it be important to have a feeling of being a grown-up? Should there be a marked moment of change, or does life just flow on?
Bronwen | 07-Nov-06 at 7:15 pm | Permalink
Praise your cat-children for their centipede hunting prowess.